Teething battles - The rise and rise of the ‘Molars’

I thought I was done with teething.  Sadly, no. Somewhere between your child’s first and third birthdays, eight molars break through. And if a sharp little incisor made your baby miserable, just think what a big square molar can do!

After the front and bottom teeth(the incisors) have come through in the first year, most toddlers get their teeth in this order:

• first molars between 12 months and 16 months
• canines (the pointed teeth on each side at the front) between 16 months and 20 months
• second molars between 20 months to two and a half years
• the third and last set of molars are wise enough to pop as and when they like.

When I recently visited Vrinda’s pediatrician, he confirmed a full form molar eruption in her tiny miny mouth. He laughed and said "she is going to be three on Nov 1^st which means she is a little late". Yes late as per the above pattern. I thought 'Pass'.

Some children do sail through teething with very little trouble. For others, it’s a few days of drooling, irritability and perhaps picky eating. At the other end are the children who really suffer. They may cry on and off through the day because of the pain, go on a hunger strike and have a broken, miserable sleep at night. Its only two days back that I found out that my little girl is sitting on this end.

If your child will let you touch her mouth, or atleast see peep inside, you may be able to confirm that the molars are about to break through by feeling the swollen bumps in her gum/seeing them, but what if you do see the swollen gums now and then, and when the time for their eruption comes, you completely forget about them? Yes toddlers do that to you at times. No matter how much track you keep of their milestones, a few important things are missed out eventually.

The same was for me, I never saw it coming. But with the sudden cough, cold and fever session; along with a complete loss for appetite, along with volcanic eruptions in her behavior, along with heavy duty tantrums, and a mouthful of blood on the third day of this whole thing, I knew something was gravely wrong.

As she woke up from her sleep and started fiddling with her mouth, asking me what’s in it, I looked closely, only to find the humongous eruptions of 3 mid molars in her mouth, one of which was bleeding profusely that morning. I got her to rinse her mouth and all the symptoms of her behavior from past couple of days, flashed back in front of my eyes.

At one point I hated myself, for not knowing it before. For not understanding. For not being there for her when all this was happening. Yes for her, this is “all that” similar to what happens in the world of grownups. It’s a big and difficult phase for her, for any soon to be three year old.

While it's helpful and so very important to know when your toddler is likely to have a tooth come through, the order and timing of how they’ll appear isn't an exact science. For most of us, we might not even remember that others are soon going to follow suit, once the incisors and canines are out. We are lost in a new world of toddler tantrums that we completely forget that history is going to repeat itself soon, that our child is going to go through that excruciating pain once again, only 100 times stronger.

On the hindsight, the good news is that teething doesn't last forever. One day she will have a shiny full set of teeth to be proud of, and forget all about her teething pains. But for now, there is a lot of pain, for both her and me.

I have been reading a lot on teething lately. One trustworthy site wrote that during teething you could offer your toddler something cold to chew on, such as:

• A raw carrot, cucumber or celery stick straight from the fridge .
• A cold, wet flannel.
• A chilled teething ring.

Cold, cold, cold. What if my child is suffering from a cold at the time teething knocks our door? All the above advice goes down the drain. Cold requires hot beverages to be administered. Whereas teething demands cold stuff. Now this is what I call an “I-don’t-know-what-to-do-situation”. And if this situation is coupled with fever, caused by a bacterial infection, that happens due to too much saliva being produced in mouth during the process of teething, which attract hands, dirty hands (no matter how many times you get them washed), and hence infections, you are in a soup. On top of the above, the liquids that develop inside the gums while molars are erupting also breed infections. Now this is a situation. I am kind of done for.

One other devil that is waiting to show up with all fervor is ‘Vomits’. Teething and vomiting have a live-in-relationship. The bigger the teeth in question, the graver the eating issues, the loss of appetite, the higher the number of vomits. It's scary when your child is throwing up. You are living this Exorcist moment time and again, and you will do anything to make it stop. But I am sorry, there is nothing that can stop it. Imagine feeding sessions of hours and hours, followed by a one minute throw up, followed by a pin drop silence for a minute and a count of 1 to 10 (off course by me! That’s my way of calming down), followed by cleaning, changing, and starting the feeding session once again. This is what encompasses the “Exorcist Moment”.

When you become a parent, you earn a medical merit badge of sorts. Weather you do this or that, eventually a few things faze you…they go out of control and you have no clue how to handle them. The rise of the molars is one of those situations. You are zapped by the extent of its devastation. As the child facing this devil, it drains her completely and as the mother fighting this battle, it drives you crazy! My only hope right now, is the gums to crack open peacefully, and those molars to cut through gently.